Sick Baby on a Plane

The trip home was a nightmare.  The night before we left John started coughing.  We didn't sleep much that night because of that, and we had to be up before 5 am, packed and ready to leave the hotel by 6 am.  We got checked in and to our gate by 7 am, but our flight wasn't leaving until 9.  John did pretty well during this wait.  He loved looking out the window at all the airplanes.  This, however, coincided with clothing change #1 because he had a major diaper blowout.  By the time we boarded and got settled in for the flight, he was asleep.  I'm thinking, wow, this might be an easy day.  ;)  We got to Shanghai and had to collect our luggage to recheck it for an international flight.  O.K.  Also, they gate-checked John's stroller, but it ended up going to baggage claim too.  Thanks.  This kid is heavy and that's exactly why we brought our stroller to the gate, so we wouldn't have it when we got off the plane.  ;)  So, after waiting in a long line at the American Airlines counter and having to have our bags rummaged through because (gasp!) we had over 100 ml of fluid in our CHECKED luggage, we got through security with everyone, including John, patted down extensively.  We're hungry now so we're scoping out where the food court is...we're looking for anything NOT Chinese at this point!  ha ha  Lo, and behold, there was a pizza place AND a Burger King!  We opted for pizza.  Now came diaper blowout #2 (no pun intended) and a shorts change.  No problem, we've got this.  We're parenting pros.  (The one bright star in the Shanghai layover was free Wi-fi and it didn't require being able to read Chinese to log on!  Score!)  John didn't eat much for lunch--a BIG red flag because this kid eats like a man.  An hour later--does he feel warm to you?  Nah, I think he's O.K.  30 minutes before boarding--this kid's got a high fever.  So, we go through the airport checking the gift shops for any children's tylenol.  Of course not.  Well, we have adult ibuprofen, so we can hide half in a gummie and he'll be fine...  (We had given away our children's tylenol to another family in our travel group with a sick child.)
After I argued my case for the stroller (and won), thank you very much, we boarded this monstrosity.  My memory of the actual flight is already a blur.  No sleep for Billy or me.  Fitful sleep at best for John, whenever he wasn't barking like a seal with his cough, or vomiting, or having diarrhea.  He was pitiful.  He wouldn't eat at all, but we could get apple juice/water down him O.K.  Not the best for diarrhea, mind you, but we're pretty limited here.  We're wrestling with what is triggering the vomiting (the fever vs. the sinus drainage when he's lying flat vs. a combination of both).  So, we're trying not to let his fever get too high...he's not eating the gummies so we're forcing the half ibuprofen tablet down...we're trying to keep him upright by sleeping on us...nothing really works.  I got by without too much bodily fluids on me, but Billy had it on his shirt and pants.  This goes on for thirteen hours.  For flight attendants we had the seat belt Nazi (who was clearly more concerned that John would somehow fall out of Billy's arms than the fact he was very sick) and apparently a self-appointed consultant for the CDC.  Really.  Yes, he had the medical exam required for his visa.  No, he doesn't have some deadly exotic illness.  No help or sympathy here.  We used all 3 of our little airplane blankets and the flimsy baby pillowcases for vomit absorption.  By the end of the flight, John had not a stitch of clothes on him except for his diaper.  I'm crying by the time we're on the ground in Chicago.
Getting through customs was suprisingly painless.  I'm getting pretty tired of waiting at baggage carousels by this point, but we get our luggage, turn in the brown envelope from the U.S. Consulate (yea, John is a U.S. Citizen!), and make it through without a customs officer having to pilfer through our dirty underwear.  Before we recheck the luggage, we get out some fresh clothes for Billy and restock the carry-on for John.
John is feeling a little better now so we're hopeful.  He eats some McDonald's fries and although he still has the horrendous cough, seems to have a little more life in him.  After we eat a bite and freshen up, it's about time to board the plane to Huntsville!  In that short flight he manages to vomit up all those fries and have another diaper blowout...on Billy.  Fever once again has spiked.
Never in my life was I so happy to be almost home.  :)
Homecoming to be continued...

Guangzhou Day 7--Last Day!

We stayed around the hotel all day and enjoyed the lazy, rainy day. John had a screaming fit mid-morning and that ended in one exhausted little boy who only gave in by falling asleep. He slept a couple of hours, so he didn't get an afternoon nap. We were able to pick up his passport with his U.S. visa this afternoon, so we're all set! We leave the hotel at 6 am, and I think around 28.5 hours later, we land in Huntsville! I cannot wait to see my babies!

Guangzhou Day 6--Consulate Appointment

I didn't get this typed up last night, mostly because there isn't much really to tell. :) Our boredom is getting the best of us. Sure, we could take a taxi and go on some sort of sightseeing trip but we're just over it. We just want to come home and resume life, with a new little person in it. We miss our children so much! However, we do not regret our decision for them to stay at home. It would have been a rough trip for them. Plus, we've got to spend time getting to know John. He has really needed undivided attention from us to get him through this big life change! That's about to come to a screeching halt! ha ha


We've so far stayed healthy on the trip. We've about given away all of our medication to the other families with us. It seems like there's at least one family member in each of them that has been under weather. So, we're coming home without the amoxicillin, baby Tylenol, Cipro, and Permethrin. Yeah, we think one kid had scabies. :( About the only thing we've endured is I strained my lower back some, probably by carrying big John!

The big accomplishment for our Thursday was our long awaited U.S. Consulate appointment! We don't have any pictures from this as they don't allow cameras or any electronic devices inside. It really was a lot of waiting once we got there, and then when it was finally our turn at the window, it was quick and painless. We did take an oath together as a group that all of our documents and statements were true, yada yada yada. Our guide will go later today and pick up John's visa. Then we are clear to come home!

We had a nice dinner last night at an Italian restaurant. It wasn't as good as back home, but it was definitely comfort food. We're all for that. We're pretty tired of looking at food, trying to figure out what it is. ha ha

 Ready for the Consulate Appointment

Bath Time!!

Guangzhou Day 5

This is beginning to feel like Groundhog Day. We are so ready to come home! We miss the kids and are starting to miss our responsibilities just a little. :)

John started the day off by throwing a big fit. Billy took away a toothbrush holder that he was playing with and he would not get over it. He starts out with a fake cry and burying his head on the floor, and then it escalates into real tears and then screams. Nothing brings him down once he's all revved up. It was time to go down for breakfast, so I carried him through the hallway, down the elevator, across the lobby, and into the restaurant while he was screaming. It seemed like everyone was staring at us. I guess it seemed that way because they were! The nice hostess greeted us with "Outside?" We were flabbergasted that she could read our minds! lol So, we got to sit by the waterfall and the koi pond while eating breakfast. This is a rough life! Oh, and he did calm down once we were outside and saw the fish. After we finished eating I shredded his leftover waffle to feed them, and he loved that. After that was all gone, he walked over and got the rest of his bacon before I knew what he had and fed that to the fish too.

We went as a group on the bus to visit Shamian Island. This is the area where we stayed when we adopted Rebecca. It is a beautiful place, full of trees and European colonial architecture (because it used to be owned by the British). There are several small shops, but not as many as there once were when more adoptive families would stay here. The travel medical clinic used to be here, but since that has moved, not as many families stay here. Also the White Swan Hotel is now closed, awaiting renovation.

We visited Susan's Place, which is run by a gentleman from Rebecca's city, Wuchuan. He was so helpful to us when we adopted Rebecca. Wuchuan has a special dialect of Cantonese, and he could speak to Rebecca where she could understand. He remembered us and wants us to email him a new picture of Rebecca when we get home. We bought several gifts here for the kids and had tea with him.

We had lunch at an old favorite, Cow and Bridge, a Thai restaurant. I didn't think it was as good as I remembered. We decided against going out for dinner and opted for snack food out of ziploc bags. Yum. Billy just had to bring up that he wanted some popcorn. Oh, that sounds good!

Tomorrow morning we have our Consulate appointment! On Friday John's visa will be ready and then we fly for home Saturday morning!

Guangzhou day 4

We stayed around the hotel today, doing a lot of nothing. We walked through the gardens and by the waterfalls and koi ponds, walked around the pool, played on the playground, and played in the playroom. We should have went swimming, but since John was up a lot later last night and didn't sleep as late as usual, we thought he'd take an early and long nap. Umm, no.

For dinner we did meet several people at a nearby Thai restaurant. The food was pretty good, but the entertainment was hilarious. The staff sang and danced to American pop music and even serenaded a few people. They really got into it! The funniest song was their rendition of "Like a Virgin" by Madonna. One of the guys would really swing his hips to that one. John seemed to enjoy the very loud music. One of the ladies even picked him up and danced with him a little.

John is preferring Billy to me now. He's always reaching for his Baba. I'm not completely rejected; I'll do if Billy is not around. :) It's O.K. because he's going to be with just me soon enough when Billy goes back to work.

 View from out hotel room.

 Dinner entertainment.

 Sharing Cheerios with the fish.

 Lots of koi!

Having fun sliding with his Baba.

Guangzhou Day 3

Today's business was getting John's TB test read.  We loaded the bus and went back to the medical clinic for a quick skin check.  We all then went to the zoo.  It was HOT today.  Yesterday it rained some, so it was muggy, but nothing compared to today.  I had forgotten how miserable the weather is here.  It was like Mobile in July!  The zoo was nice, but the heat & humidity kept us from really enjoying it.  John loved seeing all the animals.  We saw pandas along with all the other animals you would expect to see at the zoo. They had a children's play area which we did NOT go in.  There were some little wading pools in that area where children were playing NAKED.  I think I counted 5 completely nude little boys splashing around there.

We don't see as many bare kid bottoms in split pants here as we did in the other cities.  This city seems more westernized in many ways, maybe because it's so close to Hong Kong.  There are also many international travelers and business people here.  But we did see a gentleman relieve himself in front of our 5-star hotel tonight.

John and I took a nap when we got back to the hotel after the zoo.  I'm getting used to the afternoon nap!  One kid, no housework=piece of cake!  LOL  After that afternoon of leisure, we went to a Mexican restaurant for dinner.  It was so good, but expensive!  It was more expensive than a Mexican meal back at home.  Billy had to go back to the hotel for more money while we were waiting on the food!  hahaha  I think it came to $40 for the three of us.  A splurge for sure.  It was worth it though.  It was the best comfort food we've had so far. :)

After dinner, we walked to the local Trust Mart, which is the Wal-Mart equivalent.  We were almost out of diapers and we opted for the Chinese brand as the were half the price of Pampers or Huggies.  We'll see how they compare.  :)

That's about it, other than I've washed a couple of "loads" of laundry in the bathtub tonight.  I washed some in Zhengzhou too, but I had a clothesline in the bathroom there.  This place is too fancy for an in-room clothesline, I guess.  The housekeeping staff will enjoy my creative ways of hanging tomorrow.  We also sent out some laundry to be done in Zhengzhou.  I think that total was around $30, so I'm just trying to get by until we get back home. :)

Guangzhou Day 2--Happy Mother's Day!

Today our group went to a shopping mall and wholesale jewelry mall. It was hot and unairconditioned. We got some Chinese dresses and jade necklaces for the girls and a couple of Chinese outfits for John. We're still trying to scope out what to bring back for the boys. I don't think Chinese swords will make it through U.S. Customs. ;) We ate at Pizza Hut AGAIN at the mall. I think that makes a total of 5 times on this trip. We've sworn ourselves off of Pizza Hut.


John decided he didn't want to take a nap when we got back to the hotel, so he threw himself a little tantrum. He is stubborn! We finally just laid him down in the floor and let him scream, while we pretended to read or watch T.V. When he calmed down a little, I picked him up and held him. He started it up again so I laid him in the crib and sat on the bed. When he calmed down some I picked him up and rocked him to sleep. Attachment parenting is really hard. I mean, we all do some sort of attachment parenting with our biological kids, but with adopted children who have been institutionalized, it's a whole different set of rules. John had been cared for but he had not been parented. Big difference.

After nap we got him dressed in his red Chinese outfit and went downstairs for a group picture. We then walked with our group to a nearby Malaysian restaurant for dinner. It was pretty good. My drink was coconut milk out of a real coconut, so that was fun.

Tomorrow we go back to the medical clinic for John's TB test to be read, and then we go to the zoo.

 Dad & the Little Emperor

 The coconut

 My Mother's Day card.  Billy had all the kids to color and sign it before we left, and then he had John to color a section.  So sweet!

 Eating with the Rosboroughs at dinner

 The Lifeline group

Ready for my picture!

Guangzhou Day 1

Yesterday we hung out around the hotel in Zhengzhou waiting for our guide to pick up John's passport. We packed everything up so we could be ready for our 5:10 pm flight. That's about it, besides taking John to the playroom a couple of times. He had to get in a little catnap before we left the hotel around 2 pm. The plane was late getting to the gate, so we didn't board until almost 5. Then, we sat on the tarmac for an hour and a half. There was a bad thunderstorm that closed the Guangzhou airport for a couple of hours, so they were waiting for that to clear. The flight to Guangzhou was about 2 hours, so it was 10:30 pm before we even arrived at the hotel.


We had seats in the very last row, across from the bathroom (there are men that don't close the door while they use it) and also across from a guy traveling in handcuffs. Nice. John did great during the flight. He slept for most of it!

The Garden Hotel in Guangzhou is the nicest hotel we've ever stayed in, but it's cheaper in price than the one we stayed at in Zhengzhou. We've been playing with all the little gadgets, like the remote control shower curtain and the rainfall shower head. We even had fresh roses in our room. I told Billy he should have just told me he had them sent for Mother's Day. The breakfast buffet (included in our room rate) is really good too.

On our itinerary for the day was to have John's medical exam done. The U.S. requires all the children to go through this to screen for any major infectious diseases. It's really just a formality--they do a height/weight check, ENT exam, a quick history and physical, and then a TB skin test. The clinic is crowded with families with newly adopted children, so it's quite a lively (loud) place. We had to wait for a bit while our guide registered everyone in our group, so we were sitting in a waiting area. Many parents were pulling out snacks for their kids, and well, John wants any food that anyone else has. So, after he went through the Cheerios, Billy got out a banana to feed to him while I went to fill out some paperwork. The next thing I know is I hear John screaming and crying at the top of his lungs. Billy decides to bring him to where I am, and he keeps screaming and screaming. No amount of candy is diffusing this one. Billy tells me the reason for this tantrum: After John had eaten down some of the banana, Billy peels the rest of it and hands the banana to him. Tantrum begins and he pushes the banana away. Billy eats the rest of the banana. Tantrum escalates. We are being stared at. A nice nurse comes over a hands John a piece of candy. He throws it across the room. Our guide finally comes over and speaks a few words to him and sternly looks at him in the face while shaking her finger at him. He starts the snub cry. He's calm enough now for a lollipop. Think he might have been spoiled? :)

John did awesome for the rest of the exam. The doctor did note a faint heart murmur, so we'll have to get that checked out once we're back home. When it came time for the TB test, he cried just a little. He then wanted lots of sympathy by showing us his boo-boo over and over.

After we came back to the hotel, we walked to Burger King for lunch. Billy ordered a #1 (Whopper meal) and I wanted the #16 (regular cheeseburger meal). The cashier thought Billy wanted 16 #1's, and the total rang up to over 500 yuan. Funny stuff, this language barrier.

After lunch Billy and John took a nap, while I went to a visa paperwork meeting. I'm hoping that the paperwork is about over!

 Silly boy!

 His silly face--He learns this gets a laugh, so every time he gets "in trouble," he uses this.

 He loves his daddy now!

 sweaty boy after the tantrum

 having his ears checked

hotel lobby in Guangzhou

Zhengzhou Day 5

This morning we visited the Zhengzhou city aquarium. It was nice, but not as nice as the large aquariums we're used to back home. There was one floor dedicated for fresh water fish and another floor for salt water fish. There was a sea lion show and a mermaid show. The divers were swimming with sharks and stingrays and actually doing tricks with them. John seemed to enjoy himself, although he didn't like to get up very close to the fish tanks, especially with the larger, stranger-looking fish. I don't blame him. :)


We came back to the hotel for lunch and we all took a good nap. I think we were all still pretty worn out from yesterday. After the nap, our guide brought us our translated adoption certificate and the notarized copies of John's birth and abandonment certificates. We will get his passport tomorrow and then we'll be off to Guangzhou for the last leg of the trip! Plus maybe we will get less stares in Guangzhou.

We walked to McDonald's for dinner. John enjoyed his chicken mcnugget happy meal. We have been eating Chinese food. It's just a treat when we make the long treks to American restaurants. John has actually slowed down just a bit on his eating although he still wants everything that we're eating along with his, even if we are having the same thing. He expressed his distaste for steamed Chinese buns, fried Chinese dough, and dragon fruit this morning at breakfast. Don't worry, buddy, we won't be having any of that at home anyway!

We stopped by another park on the way back. There was a pigeon house there with lots of white pigeons everywhere.

Bedtime was fun. We taught him to say "Roll Tide" and he kept saying it over and over. Good boy! We were also talking about the English names of body parts, like ear, nose, eyes, etc. He will usually imitate us when we try to teach him an English word. But he was adamant that we were wrong. He kept telling us the Chinese word very sternly!

He did much better with Billy today. He let Billy carry him some and would sit in his lap just a little. He's having so much fun with Billy though. He has never been around any males (except children). He's learning what it means to have a daddy!

 At the aquarium

 This was a first for me...you could bottle feed these fish!

 Pigeons at the park

 Noodles for lunch

This one says it ALL!!!

Zhengzhou Day 4--Orphanage Visit

Visiting the orphanage was important to us, as it is the only chance we'll have to see where John lived and how he was cared for during those first years. We were able to visit Rebecca's orphanage also, and it was an eye-opening experience. Not every family gets the opportunity, so we are grateful to have been able to get some glimpses into our children's pasts.


I was nervous about today because I knew it would not be easy for John. I prayed that it would not be too traumatic for him. He had a tough time on Gotcha Day with just a couple of members from the orphanage staff, so seeing his caregiver(s) again would likely be pretty emotional. It took us a little over an hour to drive to Kaifeng. We were able to travel with another family that adopted a child from Kaifeng this week as well. When we arrived, we were greeted by the orphanage's adoption coordinator. She was one of the ladies that brought John to the adoption registration office on Monday. He clung to me when he saw her. I thought that was progress because he certainly wanted her on Monday! We were led into the office and met some of the other staff. The adoption coordinator told us a little about the orphanage, that it housed 230 children and what services they were able to provide for the children.

We then walked back outside and were led across the driveway to the gate of the children's homes and courtyard. We were quickly greeted by John's nanny. He went immediately to her and he was so happy to see her. He didn't want anything to do with me after that. We visited the first room on the right, which was the room of the other child whose family was with us. There were several children in this room. I wish I would have counted, somewhere around 10-15. There was also a small room with very tiny premature babies. One was getting an IV. There was one just inside the larger room, lying in a small crib, covered with layers of quilts. It couldn't have weighed more than 2 lbs, if that. No oxygen, no IV's. It was in some respiratory distress, just from what I could gather from looking at its neck. I wouldn't expect this little one to survive. I had to fight back the tears. I wanted to whisk it away and take it to the nearest hospital for care.

We then walked back outside in the small courtyard and walked a few steps across to John's room. There were many children and babies here as well. I would say the average age was a little higher in this room but there were still some small babies here. Overall, this was a "healthier" room. There was a little girl in a walker with cerebral palsy, a little boy with Down's Syndrome sitting in a chair, a child with albinism, a girl with scoliosis, and a little girl with a scar on her chest (I assumed to have a repaired heart defect), among some of them. I gave John's nanny some lollipops to pass out to the children. They all seemed to enjoy them. John had been "sharing" his food and candy with me until now. Now he refused to even look at me.

They showed us his bed and told us a little about his daily life. While an orphanage is no place for a child to grow up, I felt like the staff here truly cared for the children. I know that John was loved. He was cared for. Because of that, he will love us back some day. Several times I even noticed tears in his nanny's eyes.

Now came the really hard part. The parting. The nanny led him out of the courtyard back to the driveway area. She told him what was happening, that I was his mama, and Billy was his baba, and he was to go with us again. Not what he wanted to hear, I'm sure. I was motioned to take him. Screams, lots of screams. Lots of tears. A way more visceral reaction than he had on Gotcha Day. He fought with all his might to be released from me so he could go back to his home. I went ahead and got on the bus so he could at least be out of sight from everything. Nothing would calm him. Not a drink, not a toy, not candy or food. He wanted nothing from me. It was heartbreaking to watch him grieve so. The loss he was feeling was immense, more than I ever imagined. To keep myself calm I had to keep reminding myself that I was not the one who abandoned him. I did not put him in this orphanage. He cannot stay here. He needs a family.

After what seemed like an eternity, the others boarded the bus, and our guide came back to help me. She spoke to him in Mandarin, and offered him some of the food that the nanny sent with us. He was able to calm down some after this and the crying subsided. Before long he was laughing with us on the way back to Zhengzhou. This evening has gone well also. I thought we might have to start over, but he still seems comfortable with us. He's even letting Billy holding him more.

I write this to remember this time. But my fervent prayer is for others' hearts to be opened to helping the hopeless of this world. We ARE responsible. We ARE called. We live a LAVISH lifestyle while many suffer. Maybe it IS my fault that John was abandoned. Maybe his family could not bear the financial hardship of caring for a special needs child. Maybe they loved him and wanted a future for him. If we continue to do nothing, nothing will be done.


View as we entered Kaifeng--so much smog

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Sleeping on the way to the orphanage

 Road to the orphanage


Main gate to the orphanage

 inner gate to the orphanage


not happy to see the orphanage adoption coordinator (right). Our guide (left) is explaining to him why we are here.

 
Entrance to the courtyard where the children's rooms are.

So happy to see his nanny again.

John's picture on the wall in the first children's room.



John's room

 giving kisses to his friend

 Walking out of the courtyard with his nanny, for the last time.

Zhengzhou Day 3--It's official, he's ours!

John went to sleep around 8:30 all by himself after I laid him in the crib. He sucks his left thumb to go to sleep. Thumb suckers are adorable, but horrible to break the habit! :) Vivian still likes hers at bedtime sometimes. He slept all night, and we had to wake him at 7 am so we could get to breakfast because we were leaving to go back to the adoption registration office at 8 am. We were having some trouble with too many stinky diapers, so we have had to ease off of the junk food. He had eaten gummies, lollipops, M&M's, and KFC the day before. For breakfast we stuck with eggs, fruit, and yogurt.


When we arrived at the registration office, he played in the little (nasty) play area while we waited on the other families to arrive. When our guide was gathering us up to get our certificates of adoption, I assumed that we would be going into another office and I didn't know how long it would take. John had a very full stinky diaper, so he had to be changed pretty quickly, so I asked if they could wait a minute while I changed him. Well, all that had to be done was the registration officer gave everyone their adoption certificates and said a nice "congratulations" and that was it. So, we had to be given special treatment and she did it all over again for us. ha ha If I had known that was it, I really would have waited on the diaper! But what a moment! We are officially and legally his parents!

After the registration office, we drove to the notary office for more official paperwork. Since John was only wanting me to hold him at this time I got to be the one to carry him up 6 flights of stairs as there is no elevator in that building. I was more out of breath carrying over 30 lbs. up those stairs than climbing the Great Wall!

We got back to the hotel and stayed in our room for the bulk of the day. John was a little upset when we got back to our room. His tummy was still bothering him and we went through a few more diapers. We fed him a banana, yogurt and Cheerios for lunch, and then when he got up from his nap he had some congee. His tummy has been much better since. We're going to ease him into the American fare. There is nothing he won't eat, and he eats a lot! That's really the only orphanage-type behavior that we're seeing: overeating. He's OK when something is all gone, but if there is more to eat, well, he wants to eat it.

He had a hard time going to sleep at naptime. He didn't want to lie in his crib, so I laid him between Billy and me on the bed. He did not want to have anything to do with Billy at that time, so John and I moved to the other bed. He went to sleep pretty quickly but he woke up a couple of times fretting. I guess he slept around an hour.

After nap and his snack, he was happy again and we went for a walk in the nearby park. He really enjoys riding in the stroller. We walked down to Pizza Hut for dinner. No pizza for him! He had fried rice, although he wanted our pizza too. :)

Bathtime is such fun. He just loves it! Lots of splashing and giggles.

Bedtime tonight was a breeze. Hope he sleeps all night again!

Tomorrow we visit his orphanage. I know it's important to see where he's been all his life, but I just hope it's not too traumatic for him. I'm praying that he wants to stay with us and not reach for his nanny.

 French fries at KFC

 I love mealtime!

 Taking a walk in the park and blowing bubbles!

With his orphanage mate at the adoption registration office